Jokes,24 Ways to Know if You've Been in Band too Long Joke,Top Ten Drummer Jokes,Question and answers Joke

24 Ways to Know if You've Been in Band too Long Joke

24. You actually like marching band and would kill to do it all year long.

23. The drummers start making sense to you.

22. You have to stay in step with people around you while walking.

21. You direct the songs on the radio.

20. Playing "stare down" with the drum major is no fun anymore.

19. You wonder what life would be like if you weren't in band.

18. You roll step while you walk to class.

17. You practice your marching music on a daily basis.

16. You think Louie Louie is the best song ever written.

15. You major in music and usse your high school band director as a role model.

14. Those stupid "band humor" jokes are the funniest things you ever heard.

13. You pick out instruments from the music in cartoons.

12. You start screaming "LEFT! LEFT! LEFT!" to people that walk in front of you on the way to class.

11. Drummers start making sense to you.

10. You've dated everyone in the band and now wonder if you've ever gonna have another date.

9. you think that trumpeters have a right to be egotistical.

8. You don't think flutiest have a slight attitude problem.

7. You change from your instrument to the tuba.

6. You have perfect pitch.

5. The band director is always right.

4. You marry that special someone in your section.

3. You have kids and force them to be in music.

2. Drummers make lots of sense to you.

1. You can relate to more that a fourth of these things!

Top Ten Drummer Jokes

1. What do Ginger Baker and canteen coffee have in common?

They both suck without Cream.

2. How many drummers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Just one, so long as the roadie gets the ladder, sets it up and puts the bulb in the socket for him.

3. What is the difference between a chiropidist and Ginger Baker?

A chiropidist bucks up your feet

4. How many drummers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Five: One to screw the bulb in, and four to talk about how much better Neil Peart would have done it.

5. How can you tell a drummer's at the door?

The knocking speeds up.

6. How can you tell when a drummer's at the door?

He doesn't know when to come in

7. How can you tell when the drum riser is level?

Drool comes out of both sides of the drummer's mouth.

8. What do you call a drummer that breaks up with his girlfriend?

Homeless.

9. How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None: they have a machine to do that now.

10. What's the last thing a drummer says in a band?

"Hey guys, why don't we try one of my songs?

Question and answers Joke

Q. How can you tell if a plane is full of flute players?

A. When the engines stop, the whining continues

Q: How many drummers does it take to change a lightbulb?

A: None. They have a machine that does that now.

Q: What do you call someone who hangs around a bunch of musicians?

A: A drummer.

Q: How do you know if there is a drummer at your door ?

A: The knocking always speeds up.

Q: Why do drummers always have trouble entering a room ?

A: They never know when to come in.

Q: How many lead trumpet players does it take to change a light buld?

A: 50. 1 to do it and the others to stand around and say, "I could do that

better.

Q: What do lead trumpet players use for birth control?

A: Their personality.

Q: How do lead trumpet players greet each other?

A: "Hi, I'm better than you."

Q: What's the inscription on dead blues-singers tombstones?

A: "I didn't wake up this morning..."

Q: What's the difference between a moose and a blues band?

A: The moose has the horns up front and the asshole behind.

Q: How many members of U2 does it take to change a light bulb?

A: One. Bono holds up the light bulb, and the universe revolves

around his ass.

Q: Why is it good that drummers have a half ounce more brains than horses?

A: So they don't disgrace themselves in parades.

Q: What's the difference between a band director lying dead in the road and a squirrel?

A: The squirrel has skid marks.

Q: What's the difference between a trombonist lying dead in the road and a squirrel lying dead in the road?

A: The squirrel might have been on his way to a gig.

Q: What do you get when you drop a piano down a mine shaft?

A: A flat minor

Q: What did the drummer get on his IQ test?

A: Drool.

Q: How do you get a trumpet player and an alto saxophonist to play in tune?

A: Shoot the alto player.

Q: What's the difference between a viola and a violin?

A: A violin burns faster.

Q: Why is a violist like a terrorist?

A: They both f**k up bowings.

Q: What is the difference between a violist and a terrorist?

A: Terrorists have sympathisers.

Q: What's the difference between a violist and a dressmaker?

A: A dressmaker tucks up frills.

Q: What's the difference between a viola and a trampoline?

A: You take off your shoes to jump on a trampoline.